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Alex In Wanderland - ebook View larger

Alex In Wanderland - ebook

A strange new toy leads a married couple to an alternate universe and an ancient prophecy.

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    Thrust into an alternate world, a married couple finds themselves as saviors of the land, with subtle hints of a slow and painful death as their ultimate reward. Alex and Alexis find themselves on a not-so typical quest to fulfill a ridiculous ancient prophecy. Their travelling companions: the priest, the protector, and the thief, are suspect, and everyone else seems out to stop them from reaching their ultimate goal.

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  • Grade 
    10/15/2017

    I fell into the rabbit hole.

    Sci-Fi meets Fantasy meets Monte Python meets A Comedy of Errors and now all shall bow before the (fake) Goddess or face impending doom, destruction, despair, and, of course, death by dragoons and dragons.

    In this comedically exaggerated tale, an unhappily married couple, Alexis, a financial advisor and past D&D geek, along with Alexander, an unemployed literary writer and poet, are mistaken for the Twins of prophecy and transported via Alexander’s new gadget to an unknown universe where they are greeted by priests, placed in group with three others, and sent off on a quest before the couple can figure out that they aren’t, in fact, just dreaming. The group, now known as the Five, must play their divine parts and journey to Illyrium to speak to the King (whose name I deeply love but refuse to share) and towards their own deaths in order to free the people from the oppressive rule of the greedy barons.

    Reading an author for the first time is like becoming dance partners. The author is the leader and the reader has to follow. With that said, it took me about four chapters of reading before I became comfortable with R.J. Hore’s style and rhythm. It took me that long to understand that Hore was purposefully taking unbelievable leaps and was having fun with this and up until that point I had been too stiff and rigid. I relaxed and our dance and the reading flowed smoothly in step. It was in chapter four that I fell into the rabbit hole, laughing all the way down. My mind is still adjusting to being forced out of Wanderland by the ending of the book. I am seated now back within reality, but still being twirled around on the inside, eagerly awaiting the next book and our next dance.

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    Alex In Wanderland - ebook

    Alex In Wanderland - ebook

    A strange new toy leads a married couple to an alternate universe and an ancient prophecy.

    EXCERPT

     

    Alexis screamed in his ear. She doubled over as though ready to bring up supper—if she had any. She clutched at him and opened her eyes.

    His ears buzzed as if his head hosted an unruly crowd of cicadas. Everything continued to revolve.

    Alexis’ mouth gaped but no further sound came out. Her clenched knuckles bulged white where they gripped his arm.

    Shaking, he clung to Alexis and, using her as a prop, staggered to his feet. The world around him slowed, dissolved into focus and the sensation of sickening movement ceased.

    A loud ringing echoed inside his skull.Was that the doorbell? Who could that be? The ringing didn’t sound like the front door, more resembled a Chinese gong. Where did that come from?

    They lurched together like a pair of drunken dancers, and after a long moment, steadied. The sky above glowed with a million stars displayed through parting clouds. Darkness stretched to the horizon, except for the shimmering ring of a thousand pinpoints of flickering light somewhere at his feet.

    Alexander’s straining eyes accustomed to the gloom, and he stared around. He stood, clutching Alexis and swaying on a platform, or maybe a flat roof, at the top of a high building. A loud ringing echoed through the night. Someone pounded on a gong, a large one by the sound.

    “Whatever was that?” He gasped. His stomach did a flip-flop.

    He inhaled wood smoke, or perhaps some sweet incense. Alexis held a firm grip on his arm.

    She moaned. “What happened? Oh, my head.”

    “The Twins have come, they are here,” a hoarse voice shouted from close behind him.

    Roaring rumbled up from far below. He turned around, Alexis still hanging on tight to him.

    A round, bald man garbed in a yellow robe stared at them wide-eyed. The glow from a nearby torch gleamed gold off his nose ring. He shouted, “Quick, acolytes assist them.”

    Half a dozen men, also hairless, and garbed in what appeared to Alexander to be lemon-yellow bathrobes, rushed forward from behind a high, triangular archway and pressed around them, bowing and bobbing like a flock of hungry pigeons. The newcomers surrounded the clinging pair, reaching out for them with painted nails.

    “Get your filthy hands off me,” Alexis cried out.

    From the strangled sound of her voice, she struggled to hold back a full-fledged scream.

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